Tired

I don't know what you have been through. I don't why you always mad at me. I don't know what was my fault. I've tried everything to be a better person for you. But I guess, you can't change if someone doesn't feel the same thing towards you. I am sorry for being so clingy. Maybe, I was blind by your promises. Ah, yes. Promises. Those promises that you made to me. I know that choosing you was the biggest mistake. I know people change but a part of me still wanna make it works. Still wanna give a chance to our relationship. You don't know how many times, I wanna break up simply because of how you treat me. You've changed and I miss the old you but apparently, we're not the same page anymore so I gotta let you go. Maybe I am just so unlucky in love.

I can't keep up with your mood. Obviously hahaha. I've tried not to screw up our conversation and your mood. I don't want you to be mad at me. But I'm so tired of being with you. I'm so tired to be with someone like you. I'm so tired of a giving shit about you when you don't care about me. Im so tired trying to understand you. Im so tired of begging you to stay when all I wanted is to end our relationship. I'm just scared to be alone. I'm scared of the idea of people leaving me. I'm not complaining but can you at least appreciate me? Are u really love me or am I just fooling myself? Did you actually mean what you said, or were you just being fake like everyone else?

Maybe it's me overthinking but shouldn't that be such an easy phrase to say to me? I do admit that I have trust issues. I don't trust anyone except my best friend. My entire life shows me why I should not trust people even your own family betrayed you. If you know, you know. Sometimes, I would call you randomly on whatsapp just because I wanted to make sure that you're not on another call with anyone. Sometimes, I would overthink when you sent me your cute selfie of you going out. My head will always think, did you meet another chick behind me? Maybe I'm just too paranoid. I don't want to be an annoying clingy girlfriend so I just keep it to myself.